A story with a conservative ending.

[PHILIP SCHNEIDER]

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from

Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a

young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.

The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large

piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his

knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its

face, stared at him for several tense moments.

Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled.

Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.

Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son.

As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked

over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing.

The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then

put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while

staring at the man. Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help

wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed

over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure.

He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder.

The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed

him against the railing, killing him instantly. Probably wasn't the same elephant.

This is for everyone who sends me those heart-warming bullshit stories.

Doesn't everyone know you can't put the Republican Party "character" in a cage and keep him silent?