What the GOP Candidates Should Be Saying

[Sandra]

The United States had a flat tax system for 127 years. Our simple tax code allowed the poor to become rich and the rich to become poor

What the GOP Candidates Should Be Saying

Clay Codner  Thursday, December 1, 2011
 
The seductive serenade of the latest GOP primary debate is fresh in my mind and turkey is still fresh in my belly. Much like the Wonder Pets song, the debate in Las Vegas made me want to take my cordless drill to my skull. The CNBC debate was much more interesting. Like criminals standing before the Russian Politburo, the GOP candidates stood to face their would-be executioners.

I still don’t recognize the inquisitors - except for Jim Cramer. Cramer is so outrageous you can’t help but know who he is. Over and over, the inquisitors demanded to know why the candidates dared to oppose the communist ideal. The funny thing is that CNBC is supposedly a business network. Change the channel if you want to keep your money safe.

I suppose I could rail for several pages against the sleeper debate on CNN, or those at NBC who consider themselves our Communist overlords, but that’s too easy. Instead, here’s some things the candidates aren’t saying that I wish they would:

The United States had a flat tax system for 127 years.  Our simple tax code allowed the poor to become rich and the rich to become poor.  It helped make us the most powerful nation on Earth. Clearly it’s a stupid idea….

Herman Cain’s 999 plan is not perfect. It has managed to prove that everybody on stage but Newt and Herman will say anything to get the nomination.

Basic management skill would fix our regulatory system

Basic management skill would fix our regulatory system. Focus on results. Every barrel of oil you spill is an immediate fine of 10X the market price. If oil is $100 per barrel, every spilled barrel is $1000 - payable NOW. Somebody crashed your passenger jet? That’s $1,000,000 per person NOW, indexed for inflation. No courts, no delay. Payable to the families NOW. Not your fault? We don’t care. Suck it up buttercup. Geez, that was tough, but I just replaced about 1,000 pages of regulations.

I have investigated and believe 100% in a flat tax, but “Flat Tax” is not a plan. It is where we need to be, but you can’t just slap it in.

What happened to Michelle Bachman? In Vegas she channeled her inner tax lawyer all night. If she is elected, you may need a supercomputer to do your taxes. 

Ron, I like having you on stage, because you bring an excellent perspective on many issues. To be clear: you can not win. Don’t go after the front runner just because he’s the front runner. Play your role and maybe we’ll let you audit the Fed.

She turned me into a Newt!!! I got better….

One of my big pet peeves is the complete lack of science knowledge politicians have. My neighbor’s dog has more knowledge of global warming than a typical politician. Especially that Fruit Loop Al Gore.

There IS a correct answer to the Yucca Mountain question. To my knowledge, no politician ever has answered correctly. Please Google “Gen IV nuclear reactors” for the CORRECT answer. Do your own homework on this one.

Hey Ron, it isn’t right to dump our trash on the people of Nevada, but it is OK for Nevada’s Senator to hold 100% of the country hostage by blocking any bills he doesn’t like? Forget Yucca, dump it all on the Vegas strip!

You may not realize that 84.5% of Nevada is owned by the Federal Government. What you may not know is that nobody wanted it. When the western states were formed, the Feds were giving away land to all takers. Nobody wanted land in Nevada.

The banks didn’t invent Mortgage Backed Securities. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac did

The banks didn’t invent Mortgage Backed Securities. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac did. The government cheered them on all the way. The first bank to sell them was Bank Of America. I’m sure glad we bailed them out….

What evidence is there that TARP saved the system? The Wall Street guys went to President Bush and said “Bail out Wall Street or the entire system (which they define as Wall Street) will fail tomorrow!”. Now the Wall Street guys go on TV to tell us that clearly Bush had no other option….

Seriously, though, we had to bail out the big banks. It’s not as if we had thousands of banks that didn’t speculate everything away ready to take up the slack…oh wait…we did….

I know for a fact that it would take a pillar of fire and a voice from Heaven to stop P&G from churning out soap and paper…and it would still entail a week long meeting on how to do it most efficiently.  The end of Goldman Sachs and Bank Of America would barely register.

Hey, Cramer – try the decaf.

Why don’t we assassinate crazy homicidal maniacs like Ahmadinejad? He’s the disease, and a Hellfire suppository is the cure. He wants nuclear weapons for only one reason. He wants to use them!

At what point are we going to have a criminal investigation of Jabba…er…Barney Frank?

Can we have an entire debate on the constitution?

Hey, Cramer – the stock market is where people risk their money for a return on their investment. If you don’t understand risk = reward, then your position makes sense. Anybody who listens to your advice is going to need a bailout.

Better yet, can we have the CIA hook candidates to a lie detector while they answer the questions? I’m sure the CIA has some way to squeeze the truth out of people. I’d like them to be required during all Presidential debates. Have extras on hand because I guarantee that President Obama will smoke at least one of them.

Hey, Cramer – try the decaf!

If all Tea Partiers are racist because of 4-5 signs replayed hundreds of times on NBC, then all Occupy supporters are murderers, rapists and thieves

If all Tea Partiers are racist because of 4-5 signs replayed hundreds of times on NBC, then all Occupy supporters are murderers, rapists and thieves. They are all anti-Semitic communists. They are all entitled children angry that a C average in Sanskrit didn’t land them a six figure salary.

The failure of Greece and Italy risks economic damage in the United States. Bailing them out guarantees it.

Profit is the fuel of our economic engine. No profit= no jobs, no growth.

Seriously, Cramer, did you get your economics degree from a Cracker Jack box?

Could the CNBC inquisitors be angrier? Is it just the absolute failure of the liberal ideology they love beyond reason? They acted for all the world like having to question these candidates was a personal insult.

Let he who is without brain-cramps be the first to condemn Rick Perry.

Vampire movies are popular these days. You deal with a vampire by stabbing it in the heart and killing it. You deal with Fannie and Freddie the same way. They must die, whether by stake, fire or sunlight.

Hey Cramer….

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