My friend "MAXINE" has a way of breaking things down so I can understand them.

[PHILIP SCHNEIDER]

Over five thousand years      ago, Moses said to the children of Israel ,

"Pick up your shovels, mount      your asses and camels, and I will lead

you to the Promised      Land."

 

Nearly 75 years ago, (when Welfare was introduced) Roosevelt      said,

"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel,      this

is the Promised Land."

 

Today, Congress has stolen your      shovel, taxed your asses, raised the

price of Camels and mortgaged the      Promised Land!

 

I was so depressed last night thinking about Health      Care Plans, the

economy, the wars, lost jobs, savings, Social Security,      retirement

funds, etc .... I called a Suicide Hotline.

 

I had to      press 1 for English.

 

I was connected to a call center in Afghanistan . I      told them I was suicidal.

 

They got excited and asked if I could drive      a truck......

 

Folks, we're screwed.